the unrequited one

Friendship is so confusing. At least when you are in a relationship, u have to agree about the date when u decided to be officially together & when you’re done you can just break it up but friendship…no one knows when did it start; it’s just happening and sometimes you don’t know it’s ended already.

In friendship, you might call them friend but they didn’t think the same or the opposite. And when you think it’s tiring you want to break it up but it’s weird to say so to “friend” so you just took step back slowly until disappeared completely from their sight & you’ll be remembered as┬áthe arsehole who suddenly disappear and forget everything you’ve been thru together.

I don’t understand, I sometimes didn’t think I’m the “best”friend but somehow the label attached on me. I did not think what we have is worth to be called friendship. I feel like I’m the casual friend who knows too much. Because bestfriend for me is them whom I really can pour my heart and soul into, them whom I could show my most real emotion and the one I mentioned above, sadly, always leaving me with pathetic and sad feeling; a ‘i-dont-belong-here’ feeling, and I’m scared because I can’t talk to them about these feelings.

it’s not their fault, they’re nice people.

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